don’t live 3000 miles away and call me cute u can’t do that
Don’t live 3000 miles away and be cute then.
NO DON’T SAY THAT THAT’S EVEN WORSE
and here’s what you missed on glee
but if YOU’RE gay and I’M gay then WHO’S FLYING THE PLANE!!!????
I don’t understand the issue people have with polyamory
if all parties are down, what’s the issue?
The Bible says Adam and Eve, not Adam and Eve and Lilith and occasionally Lilith and Eve sleep independently with Steve but Adam doesn’t like him enough to do foursomes but they all occasionally have dinner together ‘cuz Steve cooks a mean carbonara and Lilith knows this Italian deli on her way home from work with pancetta to die for but everyone’s really concerned because Eve might get a job with Apple soon and it would be great for her career but she would have to move hundreds of miles from all three of her partners and is that really worth it?
once my sister was eating pop rocks on my bed and spilled some but forgot to clean it up and apparently some pop rocks got on my pillow bc in the middle of the night i happened to drool and i swear to fucking god there is nothing more terrifying than having pop rocks exploding all up in your face when you are asleep
Derek Hale can’t get a break
There he goes to a new mistake
How much more can he take?
i was outside eating a cookie and a saw about 5 ants just roaming around on top of the steps and i noticed there was only one ant that wasn’t holding anything like the other 4 where holding dorito bits or something and the ant seemed sad it wasn’t even going in the same pace as the other ants so i put a cookie crumb next to him and he picked it up and started running as fast as the other ants and i think i made that little ants day
is that what god feel like?
Hannibal Lecter - Epitome of professionalism
That Dethan scene had product place-mint.
I just laughed for what felt like 10 minutes
pro tip: if you’re ever arrested, use your one call to call the police station and pretend to be the police chief then tell the police officer to release you from jail immediately
Stephen Colbert reading Anthony Weiner’s sext messages.